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Dudley boys split!???!!?!
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Man these have to be some of the nastiest colors I've ever seen. Anyway I wanted to pass along another April Fools joke sent through my school's (University of Illinois) massmail. It's quality.
To all University students:
It has recently come to the attention of the McKinley Health Center Staff that a recent batch of condoms purchased and already in partial distribution on campus may be defective. According to Trojan, the manufacturer of the condoms, several thousand condoms distributed to the University of Illinois may have inappropriately passed the quality control tests at their production facility.
The recall affects all Trojan brand condoms of the normal, non-ribbed, variety. If you have received such condoms from McKinley or the McKinley Resource Center since February 3rd, you are strongly advised to take the following actions:
If you have used such condoms there is small probability that
microscopic holes may have prevented the condom from performing
effectively. To determine if your pack of condoms was part of the batch that inappropriately passed the quality control tests, please take the following steps immediately:
1.) Remove an unused condom from its wrapper.
2.) Fully unroll and stretch the condom and rotate it looking for the lot numbers imprinted near the base of the condom.
3.) Alternatively, place your mouth on the condom and gently exhale, inflating the condom to reveal the lot numbers.
If the beginning of the lot numbers starts with:
31337-H4Ck you may have a condom from the defective batch.
Trojan has requested that we collect all unused condoms from this batch and return them immediately for testing and disposal. If you are unsure as to whether the condom pack you possess is affected or not please follow the return instructions below.
Drop points have been conventiently setup at McKinley Health center and the McKinley Resource Center. For your convinience we have also arranged for the tuition drop boxes both in the Illini Union and the Henry Administration building to be opened for condom collection.
We deeply regret this incident and we realize this situation may have many serious implications. If you have any further questions we urge you to contact the McKinley Health Center.
Sincerely,
Dr. Ivana Fukalot, MD
Asst. Director of McKinley Health Center
This mailing approved by:
The Office of the Vice Chancellor for Student AffairsComment
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