Part 1: Idiots' Guide to Teamkilling, Playing Cheap, and Being an ******* on the overall.
Part 2: Being an ******* and getting away with it.
Part 1: Idiots' Guide to Teamkilling, Playing Cheap, and Being an ******* on the overall - Polarbear Style
Ever wanted that vehicle so badly because you simply own at it? Tired of silly little privates hogging up your gunner's seat when you 1337 clanmate and come and two of you can spawn camp? Sick of 'goody two-shoes' spoiling your stat-padding session?
You've come to the right place! Learn to teamkill, In STYLE I will also cover some interesting information you will need to know to make every other player's experience a lousy one besides you and your 1337 friends.
Carpe Balls - Seize My Balls.
Getting that Jet
#1 Run FULLSPEED to the jet once you spawn, remember which of the 2 spawn points on the carrier you have to get, remember where each and every helicopter/jet/tank/apc spawns. Positioning is KEY.
#2 Play Sniper or Spec Ops.
#3 Know your strengths!
- Are you a good pilot? What are your main skills - bombing only? Or can you dogfight too?
- Is there a very very good pilot (i.e. polarbearz) on the opposing team that will pwn your ass
Before you TK for the jet always know this!
a): TK-ing for the jet: You've decided you're a wonderful pilot afterall. Have the M95 ready and blow the pilot's brains out. Nice and simple! But sometimes you may get to the plane too late, that's when a spec ops is better. Run towards the plane and put C4 Directly Underneath the Cockpit and blow it ASAP. This will kill the pilot and the co-pilot but leave them plane intact (Useful to note when stealing planes too, which I will cover later). But seriously who cares about the -8 when you can planewh0re to your heart's content right?
Remember:
- Baseraping is perfectly legal. If you blow the Su-34 in cleansweep, proceed to continuously strafe the Airfield to kill it again and again. The timing is such that if you kill the Su-34 in its hangar, you can afford to unleash all your missiles at it, bomb a target at airfield, go back and rearm, and come back just in time to catch it appearing.
- Battlefield 2 is NOT a team game. Who cares if your team is getting pinned back by an armor column? Your stats are more important. Killing that tank will give you 2 kills - 4 points. Strafing the hangar and bombing the airfield will give you much more.
b): If you're not good enough to pilot.
Why let your team pilot take gold? Or get a higher score than you? Do not hesitate to jump in front of his jet. Remember that proning against the front wheel does NOTHING. Its better if you stand under the wings and jump non-stop, or just let him run you over. And don't forget to punish!
If the pilot trys to swerve out the way, even better! He gets the TK plus he'll never get the jet off the runway..
Getting that helicopter
Pretty much the same idea as getting the jet, but its a lot harder to make the helicopter TK you. The C4 charge has to be placed on the cockpit glass. Jump and toss the c4 on the glass and blow it to kill the gunner/pilot and leave the chopper intact.
To get TK-ed by the chopper, the only way is to try to get in its way when its spinning around to avoid you, or get right in front and hope he doesn't get up high enough before he goes forward.
Getting a Gunner OUT
Want the helicopter all to yourself? Learn this new trick. Don't bother crashing the chopper, you'll have to fight for it all over again. Why not let the guy DIE AND get -2 AND can pick up your 1337 friend to go baseraping!
1: Go to the edge of the map
2: Zoom in your minimap
3: Manoevre to a perfect hover (The green circle comes back on screen)
4: Inch forward till only your gunner is in the red zone (its easier if you can see the gunner)
5: Once your gunner slumps over, VOILA!
Nice and simple! But it takes a precious 15 seconds + fly time + leaving you vulnerable to the enemy chopper, so the M95 would be so much faster. What's -4 compared to 20 minutes worth of baseraping!
Getting that Armor/APC
Someone beat you to it? NO PROBLEM! Armor and APCs are trickier because there's no easy way of getting the guy out WITHOUT severely damaging/destroying the vehicle. Therefore I suggest punishing him for his folly, for taking your precious tank.
Standing in its way is of course, basic. That earns him -6: Team damage, Teamkill. But why do this when you can get your incredibly 1337 friends to help punish the idiot who took your tank/apc! Load up a jeep/FAV with 2 friends and start driving into the tank! He gets -2 first of all (2x team vehicle damage), then -6 (3x team damage) THEN -12 (3x teamkills). A nice total of -20! Teach that guy a lesson for touching YOUR vehicles! Better yet, if you have an engineer in your vehicle you can give him team vehicle damage ALL THE WAY TO THE FRONT LINES! Imagine this, guy steals your tank at gatehouse when you want to wh0re karkand. NO PROBLEM!
Get into the vodnik with a couple of mates and start ramming him all the way to hotel! Before you know it he'll have -6 to -7 EVEN WITHOUT TEAMKILLING YOU! Then force him to teamkill and repent for touching your tank.
Remember its YOURS. No one else has a right to it.
Stealing Vehicles
This is slightly trickier because of the presence of enemies and you're not already in a pwnage vehicle (i.e. armor/jet). So you have to use whatever advantage you can get. Apply for commander, or mutiny against the current one, or start a kickvote against him. Being commander when stealing a vehicle is much easier. You can UAV the area you're in and use artillery to force the enemy to take shelter so you can take their stuff.
Who cares if your team needs it! Its more important that YOU steal the jet to own with.
Back to my point. Positioning is of KEY importance when attempting to steal any vehicle. Watch the UAV carefully, make sure you know where the enemies are facing and always KILL before you STEAL. LET the enemy board the jet and c4 under him. Put a claymore at the edge of the hangar to blow him up before he can get in. ETC ETC. NEVER take a jet with the enemy alive you never know what **** he can come up with.
Better yet, you can ask friends to come and help spawn rape and you can steal under the cover of the raping going on.
Oh, don't forget to resign commander after you've taken the vehicle! Even if you forget its ok, just rack up the kills and you should win anyway. Who cares if the ground troops are dying. Its THEIR fault they were too stupid to learn any of the 1337 skillz you've just mastered by reading this guide.
Part 2: Being an ******* and getting away with it.
Part 1: Idiots' Guide to Teamkilling, Playing Cheap, and Being an ******* on the overall - Polarbear Style
Ever wanted that vehicle so badly because you simply own at it? Tired of silly little privates hogging up your gunner's seat when you 1337 clanmate and come and two of you can spawn camp? Sick of 'goody two-shoes' spoiling your stat-padding session?
You've come to the right place! Learn to teamkill, In STYLE I will also cover some interesting information you will need to know to make every other player's experience a lousy one besides you and your 1337 friends.
Carpe Balls - Seize My Balls.
Getting that Jet
#1 Run FULLSPEED to the jet once you spawn, remember which of the 2 spawn points on the carrier you have to get, remember where each and every helicopter/jet/tank/apc spawns. Positioning is KEY.
#2 Play Sniper or Spec Ops.
#3 Know your strengths!
- Are you a good pilot? What are your main skills - bombing only? Or can you dogfight too?
- Is there a very very good pilot (i.e. polarbearz) on the opposing team that will pwn your ass
Before you TK for the jet always know this!
a): TK-ing for the jet: You've decided you're a wonderful pilot afterall. Have the M95 ready and blow the pilot's brains out. Nice and simple! But sometimes you may get to the plane too late, that's when a spec ops is better. Run towards the plane and put C4 Directly Underneath the Cockpit and blow it ASAP. This will kill the pilot and the co-pilot but leave them plane intact (Useful to note when stealing planes too, which I will cover later). But seriously who cares about the -8 when you can planewh0re to your heart's content right?
Remember:
- Baseraping is perfectly legal. If you blow the Su-34 in cleansweep, proceed to continuously strafe the Airfield to kill it again and again. The timing is such that if you kill the Su-34 in its hangar, you can afford to unleash all your missiles at it, bomb a target at airfield, go back and rearm, and come back just in time to catch it appearing.
- Battlefield 2 is NOT a team game. Who cares if your team is getting pinned back by an armor column? Your stats are more important. Killing that tank will give you 2 kills - 4 points. Strafing the hangar and bombing the airfield will give you much more.
b): If you're not good enough to pilot.
Why let your team pilot take gold? Or get a higher score than you? Do not hesitate to jump in front of his jet. Remember that proning against the front wheel does NOTHING. Its better if you stand under the wings and jump non-stop, or just let him run you over. And don't forget to punish!
If the pilot trys to swerve out the way, even better! He gets the TK plus he'll never get the jet off the runway..
Getting that helicopter
Pretty much the same idea as getting the jet, but its a lot harder to make the helicopter TK you. The C4 charge has to be placed on the cockpit glass. Jump and toss the c4 on the glass and blow it to kill the gunner/pilot and leave the chopper intact.
To get TK-ed by the chopper, the only way is to try to get in its way when its spinning around to avoid you, or get right in front and hope he doesn't get up high enough before he goes forward.
Getting a Gunner OUT
Want the helicopter all to yourself? Learn this new trick. Don't bother crashing the chopper, you'll have to fight for it all over again. Why not let the guy DIE AND get -2 AND can pick up your 1337 friend to go baseraping!
1: Go to the edge of the map
2: Zoom in your minimap
3: Manoevre to a perfect hover (The green circle comes back on screen)
4: Inch forward till only your gunner is in the red zone (its easier if you can see the gunner)
5: Once your gunner slumps over, VOILA!
Nice and simple! But it takes a precious 15 seconds + fly time + leaving you vulnerable to the enemy chopper, so the M95 would be so much faster. What's -4 compared to 20 minutes worth of baseraping!
Getting that Armor/APC
Someone beat you to it? NO PROBLEM! Armor and APCs are trickier because there's no easy way of getting the guy out WITHOUT severely damaging/destroying the vehicle. Therefore I suggest punishing him for his folly, for taking your precious tank.
Standing in its way is of course, basic. That earns him -6: Team damage, Teamkill. But why do this when you can get your incredibly 1337 friends to help punish the idiot who took your tank/apc! Load up a jeep/FAV with 2 friends and start driving into the tank! He gets -2 first of all (2x team vehicle damage), then -6 (3x team damage) THEN -12 (3x teamkills). A nice total of -20! Teach that guy a lesson for touching YOUR vehicles! Better yet, if you have an engineer in your vehicle you can give him team vehicle damage ALL THE WAY TO THE FRONT LINES! Imagine this, guy steals your tank at gatehouse when you want to wh0re karkand. NO PROBLEM!
Get into the vodnik with a couple of mates and start ramming him all the way to hotel! Before you know it he'll have -6 to -7 EVEN WITHOUT TEAMKILLING YOU! Then force him to teamkill and repent for touching your tank.
Remember its YOURS. No one else has a right to it.
Stealing Vehicles
This is slightly trickier because of the presence of enemies and you're not already in a pwnage vehicle (i.e. armor/jet). So you have to use whatever advantage you can get. Apply for commander, or mutiny against the current one, or start a kickvote against him. Being commander when stealing a vehicle is much easier. You can UAV the area you're in and use artillery to force the enemy to take shelter so you can take their stuff.
Who cares if your team needs it! Its more important that YOU steal the jet to own with.
Back to my point. Positioning is of KEY importance when attempting to steal any vehicle. Watch the UAV carefully, make sure you know where the enemies are facing and always KILL before you STEAL. LET the enemy board the jet and c4 under him. Put a claymore at the edge of the hangar to blow him up before he can get in. ETC ETC. NEVER take a jet with the enemy alive you never know what **** he can come up with.
Better yet, you can ask friends to come and help spawn rape and you can steal under the cover of the raping going on.
Oh, don't forget to resign commander after you've taken the vehicle! Even if you forget its ok, just rack up the kills and you should win anyway. Who cares if the ground troops are dying. Its THEIR fault they were too stupid to learn any of the 1337 skillz you've just mastered by reading this guide.
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