If you want a fixed BF2- theres Point of Existence 2. Its basically a mod which makes BF2 into what it was supposed to be.
If you want realism- theres Project Reality.
Theres a number of WW2 mods, most prominent being Forgotten Hope 2.
There is the Sir Communitys sandbox mod, a somewhat similar mod to Garrys mod.
Theres a number of racer mods, and even a CQB mod.
It all boils down to a simple problem though- most mods arent played on Multiplayer level, enough to offer an enjoyable player pool. So eventually, youre stuck with either Allied Intent Extended singleplayer/COOP mod, or POE2 or PR.
Also, it depends on what map is loaded and the bot to human ratio. Unfortunately, a team of 32 bots as the OpFor uses a lot of resources because the server is calculating all of those bot "players", too. That's a lot of overhead on one box.
The 32-slot maps have better performance, but they aren't as popular with folks.
I've greatly enjoyed a number of mods and recommend:
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